


I only love you more

by TailorNorata



Series: Tumblr Short Stories [19]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Happy Ending, M/M, No underage, Peter has a crush, Pining, Platonic Bonding, Pre-Slash, Steter endgame, Stiles has morals, Student Peter Hale, Teacher Stiles Stilinski, kind of my spin on a Teacher/Student AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-02-07 04:36:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18613273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TailorNorata/pseuds/TailorNorata
Summary: Dear god he’d miss that laugh so much, the way it lit up the man’s face…He’d not just miss ‘this’ he’d miss him.His teacher.The only man Peter had ever loved and maybe the only man Peter would ever love like this.





	I only love you more

Peter looked at the speech he had printed out to memorize.

He had practiced it endlessly but right now didn’t really register any words except the name “Mr. Stilinski”.

It had been more than four years since he saw him.

Four years in which he had carried everything with him that the man had taught him.

About integrity.

Determination.

Hard work.

And staying true to yourself.

* * *

 

The memory of meeting his former teacher for the first time was still clear in his mind.

~*~

He had been a junior, at the top in most classes, popular, part of the basketball team, not yet fully out of the closet and kind of crushing on a guy in the year above him.

Mr. Stilinski walked into their classroom and introduced himself as their new art teacher.

Peter immediately was drawn to the visual appearance of the man but he wasn’t shallow enough to swoon over it like somebody else might.

He could already see classmates developing crushes for the guy and he’d have no part in it.

Except, over the course of the lesson Mr. Stilinski of course then showed he was smart, competent, kind but stern, surprisingly funny and witty.

Well, the guy would still have time to proof he had some flaws.

One appeared at the end of class when he announced he’d be offering an additional two hour art class on wednesdays, luckily it wasn’t mandatory.

Why would he think someone wanted to stay two hours longer if they didn’t have to?

In case anybody loved art just that much?

 

The guy was definitely overvaluing his subject.

On the other hand, loving your job was also kind of adorable.

~*~

A month went by and Peter had to admit he was maybe kind of slightly crushing on the new teacher?

Fantasies had started to make their way into his evening routine.

Fantasies of sharp, brown eyes witnessing him when he pleasured himself. 

And hands…hands! Uniquely identifiable hands that made you want to draw them, taunting him, playing with him.

A raspy, teasing voice telling him what to do.

Soft, ridiculously sensual lips showing a mischievous smirk when he caught himself in how embarrassing it was to do what he was doing.

 

Alright, yeah, he was crushing hard.

And the worst part was, he wasn’t actually doing great in class.

He had chosen art because with their old teacher it had been a very easy A but now he had to actually put work in to keep up.

That wasn’t really something he was into.

Also not something he was used to.

 

As he saw his grades drop he contemplated what to do.

He rarely had to study for anything, because he rarely decided to try something out he was bad in.

He had never intended to actually study for art class. All the former teacher had expected of them was to draw something mediocre and sometimes take a multiple choice test.

 

Eventually he decided he had to talk to Mr. Stilinski about what he could do to better his grade. After all Mr. Stilinski was bisexual - which had come out when someone had found his facebook account.

Maybe the guy was open to some kind of arrangement?

Peter would definitely not hate that.

 

A few days later after school he hurried to catch Mr. Stilinski in his classroom.

The guy was just packing his bag as Peter closed the door behind himself.

The man looked up and Peter saw those attentive eyes focus on him.

“Peter, what can I do for you?”

 

So many things…

Peter told himself that he needed to come off as confident and changed his posture before responding in a firm tone.

“I hoped we could talk about my grade.”

Mr. Stilinski hmmm-ed and continued packing.

“You are not happy about your B- I assume.”

Peter nodded and went to lean next to his teacher, against the table.

“No, I am not. I want an A. And I intend to get what I want. So what can I do to better my grade? Just tell me, I’ll do anything you want me to.”

Mr. Stilinski straightened his back and rose to his full height, staring down at Peter.

 

A moment ago Peter had felt in control by choosing to sit this close to the man, now he felt like maybe a bit more distance would have made that assessing stare less intimidating.

“Peter, are you suggesting what I think you are suggesting?”

Come on now, keep your courage up, show him you know what you are about!

He looked up at his teacher through his lashes and managed a cocky grin.

“I am very confident there is something I could do for you to sway my grade.”

 

Something dark seeped into Mr. Stilinski’s eyes and Peter felt the hairs on his arms and neck rise.

The man leaned down a little so their faces were closer and his voice got deeper and more raspy when he spoke again.

“And what do you have in mind? Tell me.”

His throat felt dry, he knew a lot of things he wanted to do to the man.

He swallowed and looked at those lips, so close to his.

Confidence, Peter!

“I could suck you off.”

Dear god, he really want to do that.

 

Mr. Stilinski pressed his lips together and tilted his head.

“I really hoped I was reading your signals wrong Peter. Has any other teacher given you the impression you could better your grade by giving them sexual favors?”

 

Shit.

Mr. Stilinski’s whole demeanor had changed.

He sounded concerned and kind, absolutely not like he might agree to Peter’s proposition.

“I…no…I never…I never needed to…”

The teacher stared at Peter a bit more.

It was getting really unnerving.

“Okay, that’s good. Then nobody needs to know about this conversation.

If you really want a better grade you could always just come to my voluntary class on wednesday afternoon. The group is a lot smaller so I could give you some more in depth tutoring.

You aren’t untalented, you just clearly don’t put any effort into this class. And I know art is an easy A in many schools but I take this serious. So you can decide if you want to ride the effortless B- or take my advice and actually study for this class.”

Peter felt very conflicted.

On the one hand he did really want that A, it would irk him to no end if he messed up his score because of fucking art class. 

And tutoring lessons with Mr. Stilinski didn’t sound that bad. Even though he’d have to recover from the embarrassing interaction they just had. 

But on the other hand it’d mean less free time, he’d actually have to put effort into this class…

 

Mr. Stilinski gave him a good-natured smile “Just think about it, I have to head out now.”

And with that he grabbed his bag and left the room.

~*~

Peter decided to actually take the lessons.

Mr. Stilinski had definitely lead Peter on a little, so he’d spell out his intentions.

It annoyed him how easy he had followed that bait as well.

Being into somebody apparently made you stupid around that person.

But somehow that bit of manipulation drew Peter only closer in to the man.

 

He started showing up to the voluntary class on wednesdays and Mr. Stilinski helped Peter study the topic they were working on.

‘A lot smaller’ was an understatement. They often were just two students, maybe 4 or 5 if a test was around the corner. Sometimes Peter and Mr. Stilinski were the only people there.

But the guy didn’t seem to be bothered by that, if anything he seemed to like the chance to focus on more detailed discussions of art with so little students to divide his attention.

 

Through the tutoring Peter realized he actually had never really learned how to study for something and the way Mr. Stilinski helped him was to explore the ways Peter actually could learn something easier.

They figured out he was an auditory learner and Mr. Stilinski started telling Peter a lot more instead of just giving him material to go through. 

They learned Peter found it easier to get into a topic for longer than just two hours so if he needed more time Mr. Stilinski often let him stay a bit longer.

Because that way he was able to get deeper into it.

 

Peter started to genuinely appreciate art as a class.

With Mr. Stilinski teaching him he realized how connected art was with everything and how omnipresent it was. 

Art was somebody’s interpretation of the world and they used it to evoke emotions. Be it a high fantasy drawing, an abstract piece, a performance, a movie. Everything could be art and art contained parts of everything.

 

As their lessons progressed they sometimes became less about the actual topic they were covering in class and more about life, about the world, about identity, the meaning of things and everything else that might come up.

Especially when it was only the two of them they sometimes went wildly off topic.

Peter had never felt this good with another person before, this understood and challenged at the same time.

Mr. Stilinski was probably the smartest person Peter ever met.

And he was not just book smart.

He seemed to understand the world, people, life…

 

Peter was way beyond fantasizing about Mr. Stilinski visiting him in his bedroom.

He was in love with the man.

His life revolved around those lessons.

He would have wanted for them to never end.

But despite all those feelings he kept his professional distance, because he now understood that the man would never actually have considered taking him up on his offer.

And frustratingly it only made him more perfect and worthy of Peter’s admiration and love.

 

At the end of the year Peter was up to a B+ and he actually was okay with that.

~*~

His last year in high school Peter started to feel something weigh on him and he didn’t know how to handle the topic. Of course it didn’t take long for Mr. Stilinski to notice and ask Peter what was going on.

He hesitated to tell his teacher what was bothering him but then decided for it.

If anybody had some helpful advice for him it’d be Mr. Stilinski.

“My parents want me to go to law school…and I am sure I’d do great. But I kind of want to do something else…”

 

Mr. Stilinski smiled at him warmly.

“What do you want to do instead?”

Peter stayed quiet for a moment, should he really say it?

Who else better to tell than Mr. Stilinski.

“I would like to become a teacher for English and History.”

 

He saw a moment of surprise on the teacher’s face and didn’t hide his grin at that.

It was seldom that something caught the man off guard.

Then Mr. Stilinski’s face went smooth again and showed another smile.

“I think you could be a great teacher Peter. I mean, the job is not great…you will be underpaid and a lot of students won’t like you, even if you try to be a good teacher. Some students might even make you morally very wrong offers…”

He gave Peter a teasing smirk.

“But I think you could handle it and help a lot of kids.”

Of course Mr. Stilinski knew what to say to make him feel less ridiculous about his idea. Maybe he really should talk to his parents about what he wanted to do.

Even though his dad would probably not be happy…

~*~

The end of his last year was approaching and Peter dreaded the day he and Mr. Stilinski would meet for the last time.

 

Peter had managed to get straight As almost through the entire year but neither him nor Mr. Stilinski had ever brought up that he could stop showing up to the voluntary wednesday class.

It gave Peter a good feeling because he suspected it meant his teacher did at least enjoy hanging out with him a little bit.

After all, if it was only the two of them Mr. Stilinski could just have canceled the class and enjoyed his free afternoon.

 

The last wednesday came and they were alone once again.

They talked about different things for a while, making jokes as usual and getting deep into some philosophical questions. But eventually Peter couldn’t avoid the topic anymore.

“I’m going to miss this” he blurted out as Mr. Stilinski had laughed at one of Peter’s comebacks.

Dear god he’d miss that laugh so much, the way it lit up the man’s face…

He’d not just miss ‘this’ he’d miss him.

His teacher.

The only man Peter had ever loved and maybe the only man Peter would ever love like this.

That was a very scary thought.

He had so much time ahead of himself…

So much time he’d not spent seeing him.

 

Mr. Stilinski had let silence fall over them and had studied Peter once again with those seemingly all knowing eyes.

“There will be others, Peter.”

“What do you mean?”

There was something like sad wisdom in the man’s expression.

“Other people you will be able to talk to like this. Other people who will understand you and challenge you. Other people you will be able to learn from. 

I know I have taken up the position of your mentor for the last two years. 

And I am okay with that, because for a mind like yours and mine some focused attention from someone can really help us grow.

And you have grown a lot. I am very proud to have been able to support you along the way for a bit. 

But you can’t just learn from one person. That would keep your view of the world tragically narrow.”

Yes there was definitely some form of sadness in Mr. Stilinski’s eyes.

 

“I will miss this too Peter. But if I can give you one last bit of advice for your future.

Surround yourself with a diversity of people. People who experience the world differently than you do. 

Let them tell you how the world is for them. And learn where your blind spots are and how to broaden your vision as much as possible. 

If you listen to all kinds of people and let them show you their world. you will come as close as you can to seeing the actual world all of us live in together. Not just your version of it.”

 

Peter didn’t know what to say to that.

He took those words though.

They did speak to a deeper truth about the world.

“Thank you Mr. Stilinski.”

He realized he sounded a bit choked and tried to blink away some uncried tears, but he didn’t really care.

 

Going home after that conversation he felt surprisingly okay.

Like that advice had been Mr. Stilinski giving him a part of himself to take with him into the future. He supposed loving the man meant honoring all that he had taught him.

~*~

And Peter had honored it.

Now he was graduating valedictorian of his class and was about to become a teacher himself.

 

They asked him to give a speech and he agreed to do it.

He invited his parents, his sister and her kids and after some contemplation also Mr. Stilinski.

Although he still wasn’t sure if his former teacher would actually show up.

He had just been some student after all.

 

He read over the speech a last time, he knew it by heart, but he also knew better than to get sloppy.

His phone rang and when he picked up his sister Talia told him they were almost there and would meet him in front of the university’s main entrance.

 

He placed the speech in the inside pocket of his suit and grabbed everything he needed to leave the flat.

~*~

When Peter was called up to give the speech he looked out into the crowd and his heart skipped a beat when he saw a very familiar face in the back of the room.

He had actually showed up.

Peter blinked twice and then just got into his speech before he might start to second guess anything.

 

He talked about his first days, about how proud he felt of the entire group he was graduating with, of how many people he met who widened his horizon and who he felt honored to have learned from.

Then, against the end came the part he was somewhat anxious about, but he was definitely not going to change it now.

“And finally, I want to thank a few people. I want to thank my parents for supporting me, my big sister for making me the thick skinned, snarky asshole I am today and I want to thank my highschool teacher Mr. Stilinski.

He taught me to not just be a snarky asshole but to also be kind, to go with open eyes through the world, to see the art in everything life has to offer.

And over all he taught me how to actually fucking study for something.

Because without that I definitely would not be standing here. 

And lastly of course, a huge thank you to all of you who made this journey with me. It’s been a great time. I wish all of you success and happiness in your future.”

 

He heard the applause but his eyes were drawn to where Mr. Stilinski was standing.

Even from this far away Peter could clearly see the smirk on the man’s face and he felt his heart beat faster.

He had to sit through the rest of the ceremony but his body and soul felt like they were just naturally gravitating towards him.

This was going to be a lesson in patience.

~*~

After the ceremony ended Peter was swarmed by family and friends to congratulate him, tell him they liked his speech and just chat for a bit before moving on to their respective next part of the evening.

 

Through all that time Peter hoped Mr. Stilinski would show up but he didn’t see the man anywhere.

Eventually he accepted his friends’ invitation to go out and celebrate.

He hugged his family goodbye and headed to the parking lot of the university.

 

In the distance he saw a person leaning against his car.

He felt his heartbeat speed up again as he instinctively knew who it was.

Forcing himself to keep a relaxed pace and not just run over to the man was difficult, but he managed it.

 

The closer he came the more he realized how weak his memory had been compared to the real deal.

There his former teacher was, casually leaning against the hood of Peter’s car, hands in the pockets of his red jacket, hair a bit longer than last time, framing his face, which currently had some charming stubble, eyes trained on Peter, mouth showing his usual smirk.

The only sign that over six years had gone by were the slightly more visible laugh lines.

And if anything that made him more attractive.

 

Peter stopped just before they’d have been in arms reach from each other.

“You remembered the car I drive.”

He got a genuine smile at that.

“Yeah.”

 

A moment of silence hung between them.

“I liked your speech” Mr. Stilinski then said, gesturing while talking, the way he always used to do.

 

Peter hadn’t know what exactly he wanted from seeing Mr. Stilinski again.

Maybe realization that he had moved on?

There had been times when he had felt like he had.

Times when he had felt very connected to other people.

People he still felt connected to.

But when the first phase of meeting a new person had cooled down nothing ever really had compared to the way he felt for the man in front of him.

So if anything he realized the opposite.

 

He had not moved on.

At all.

His heart still yearned to always be like this, just in the presence of him, at least that, if he could have nothing else.

Maybe he should try to get a position at his old highschool…his younger niece and nephew would probably hate it, so that could be fun…

“Thank you. I was very happy to see you in the audience. I wasn’t sure you would come.”

Mr. Stilinski chuckled.

“And miss the celebration of my brilliant former student’s achievements? Not a chance.”

 

Another moment filled with silence.

But this time they were looking at each other and Peter felt like the air kind of changed, got charged in some way.

He felt like this was it.

The moment.

If he ever found the right moment and the courage again to make a move, to throw all doubts out the window and be honest about how he felt, this was it.

 

“Did you know I was in love with you in high school?”

Mr. Stilinski didn’t laugh or scoff or frown, he smiled softly and wistfully sad.

“Yes Peter, it was hard to miss the crush you had.”

 

Peter shook his head.

“No, I didn’t have a crush on you. I was in love. I might not have known the difference back then, but I know it now.”

 

As Peter made that distinction Mr. Stilinski tilted his head a little.

“I apologize Peter. I didn’t mean to downplay the feelings you had back then. But either way, I hope you don’t think I should have done anything differently. There would have been no way to acknowledge your feelings without either stepping over the line or hurting you.”

 

Now it was Peter’s turn to smile wistfully.

“No, I know. And I knew even back then. It only made me love you more. 

And I meant what I said in my speech. You taught me a lot about life and about being true to myself and never stop learning from the people around me. I know it shaped a big part of the person I am today. 

And I guess I am wondering if that might be a person you woukd want to go out with.”

 

He saw that rare surprised look and didn’t hide his smile.

“Don’t worry Mr. Stilinski. This time it has nothing to do with my grades, I promise.”

 

The man scratched his neck for a moment and laughed awkwardly.

“I…uh…I didn’t expect that. But I’m not opposed to that…not…not entirely. We might have to talk about the whole me shaping you thing. 

Because that sounds an awful lot like I groomed your or something but…I’m not blind, you are an ad- we are both adults…and-”

 

Peter had to grin at how much the man’s demeanor changed the moment he didn’t feel in the position of the mentor anymore.

It was such a stark contrast to how he knew the man.

It was also extremely adorable.

And it helped Peter to find the confidence to take the lead from here.

 

He stepped closer and reached out one hand to place on the man’s neck and get him to stop rambling and focus his attention on Peter.

When he had the man’s focus Peter gave him a reassuring smile.

“You are very cute when you get flustered like that. But let me assure you, you will never be able to make me do something I don’t actually want to do. But if the context concerns you, why don’t we discuss it over dinner? I know a great place nearby.”

 

Mr. Stilinski smiled back at Peter gratefully.

“That sounds like a good plan. Also if we are actually doing this you should start calling me Stiles.”

Peter grinned and took a step back before holding out his hand for the man to take.

“Alright Stiles, let’s go.”

And the moment those long, pale fingers slid into his and closed around them he knew he’d do whatever he could to make sure he’d get to hold that hand many more times in their future.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it!  
> If you want to make my day, leave a comment :)


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